The Process: …The act of taking what is born from a simple idea, and transforming it into something tangible. The manifestation of the “unseen” or what is considered by many, a transmission from the unseen.
As you know we left off last at my needing to complete the infamous “Swim Cap” Style Head-Peace”. *Sigh… This is a heavy conversation to have. You’re probably saying to yourself, “Is it really that serious?” I am here to reassure you that “Yes it is!” and now is probably as good a time as ever to address the why…
Upon the intrusion of the Swim Cap Idea, there were a few other things in line at Studio5 that had priority over this particular project but this one started “caaaaallin me” (c. Chris Rock new jack city). I’m lucky if I ever construct a prototype at all, one because of my excitement and two because it can be a matter of minutes before one idea gets bumped out of the brain for something else that is not necessarily a better idea, but that for whatever reason carries a greater sense of urgency. The swim caps were about to be pretty easy to put on the back burner. After all, I’d already created the “shell” of the idea and that’s usually satisfaction enough for me to decide whether I want to pursue the design or not. When me and the swim cap idea first met, it was just minutes before I could see the freedom resting in this swim cap thing and all of the interpretations or possibilities it was…pregnant with! Something inside just said, “Don’t think about it too long, just DO IT and see what happens! DO NOT put it on the back burner, explore what happens when you conceptualize and ACTualize immediately. 
…ACT NOW!”. Damn that voice! It’s always saying something, right? Of course it won. Initially I thought this would be a relatively simple task. Wrong: It demanded so much not just on a physical level, but an emotional and spiritual level as well.
First, I had to figure out structure…meaning I had to draw and create a pattern of sorts that was going to ensure that the “peace” adhered to the head in the way I envisioned it. Don’t ask me how many times I cut and re-cut and stitched and took apart and cut and tweeked. Next I had to figure out the lining issue. It had to be something that would not interfere with or affect the exterior design of the “peace” and it had to feel good and not be damaging or abrasive against the hair. So I find some something suitable in my stash. Perfect! Thin, stretchy, soft…got it. Then I had to try out the same cut on the lining that I used for the outside. …About a week has passed at this point. I’m not only frustrated about my timeline, slightly irritated that “other things” have had the audacity to demand attention: “I gotta cook dinner? What?” or … “Clean up? Are you kidding me? Now?” and “Sleep? Puh-lease just hold off for a little bit longer, pleazzzzzzzzzzzzzz…”. When a good idea comes, I wanna see it done YESTERDAY. The process is very emotional simply because I’m being devoured by anticipation and excitement the entire time. Not to mention the “mystery emotions” that are ever-present with the process:: happiness, sadness, hesitation, spontaneity, creativity, restraint, indulgence…you name it.
–When, if not managed correctly, can turn into stress believe it or not. But I’m working it out, driving by the determination and hunger to see and feel the completed Swim Cap. This brings us to the ultimate: the FLOWER CONSTRUCTION.“What’s so hard about putting those lil flowers together?” you ask. What’s so hard? I’ll tell ya what’s so hard. When the concept of wEmusTgRoW was popped up, I knew it would not permit me to limit myself to neutrals or safe color combinations. But taking into consideration color, pattern and how that needed to somehow “speak” for lack of a better word, I knew it would be a great challenge, at least for me. I was a “neutrals” girl. That coupled with keeping it fresh, not getting locked into sameness and making sure that each flower that leaves my hands represents exactly what wemustgrow stands for: individuality. That’s a little pressure.
The only anything ever gets accomplished is by removing myself from the equation during the process. This is difficult to do simply because the process is me and my reason for BEing so how do you remove yourself from that? It ain’t easy I’ll say that, but it always forces me to…”grow” because it does not permit me to stay in any comfort zone.
I begin by cutting each petal piece by hand. Then color: Trusting that what gets put together is “right” without letting my “left brain” try to persuade me “it’s too much” or god forbid, doesn’t match! “Gasp!” Hard to articulate, just know the pieces must “work together” there must be some sort of rhythm, synergy, purpose and chemistry.
This Process requires me trust myself and whatever needs to happen for whomever this “Peace” was destined for and of course 8 times out of 10, I have no idea who that someone is. A great reminder that I am merely the instrument. Once flowers are constructed it’s really hard to keep looking at them. …I know, that sounds crazy, but it’s truth. The flowers “do something” but that’s another conversation. Obviously I don’t have a choice of whether or not to look at them when I’m working on them. But looking at them over and over again creates this intense energy that can become a lot to manage in my “brain station”. It multiplies. Take that in combination with the anticipation and excitement that remains and it’s insane. While it feels really good, it also feels inconvenient and burdensome at same time. Your mind always feels as though it has never caught it’s breathe from running a race. …Right, fun.
At this point it was probably approaching two weeks. The other nite I started working at about 10pm and was not going to be satisfied until I at least got all the linings sewn in which I completed at 4am. When I was done, I felt like I’d finally “earned the right to go to sleep”. …How crazy is that? I had to step back and question myself when I realized I’d even had such a thought! Finally the day has come. Posting this entry has made me feel some sense of ….relief from my anticipation-excitement-anxiety-euphoric-stress-energy! So now we’re off to post to “the Etsy” page but I must say, I feel like I need a vacation already!
I may have mentioned before that the flowers of wEmusTgRoW work like an antennae of sorts. They attract, generate, facilitate, accomodate growth and change. Four little head-peaces and I’m not sure you could fathom the energy that got put into them. All I know is, if it turns out that you become the owner of one of these head-peaces, please stay in touch. Because I don’t know what they will do, but it’s going to be something serious. I will make more, but right now my brain needs a rest. I have to “come down” because right about now my head is still tingling like it’s been for the past couple of weeks. Or that may be the official sign that …
…I AM all the way sleep deprived in Studio5.!~
Create to the third power peoples.
Love and Light
